


Mycroft's Internal Monologue

by BrynTWedge



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Anxiety, Depression, Emotional, Gen, Poetic, keeping up appearances - Freeform, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-26 21:00:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15671199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrynTWedge/pseuds/BrynTWedge
Summary: Mycroft thinks about himself and the things he must do.





	Mycroft's Internal Monologue

No other option. 

Well, one. 

 

Skin… not thick enough. 

Trousers. Shirt. Waistcoat. Tie. 

The armour to face the world. 

Blows that never show, wounds that don’t bleed. 

Pristine cloth and smoothened silk. Stay away. Unbreakable. 

A pounding heart and clenching chest won’t show through the layers. 

 

I can’t walk away, I can’t just leave. 

I have to watch. 

The thing about being in the shadows… you can see everything. 

There isn’t a darker place for secrets to hide. 

No one can see me here, but I can see them. 

Oblivious. 

Carefree. 

Unaware. 

 

The skin may be thin, but the armour holds the breaks in place. 

I will go. 

They won’t know. Not the truth. 

I can see through them… their ridiculous attempts at hiding mean nothing. 

Why can’t anyone else see it?

Why can’t people realise? Think?

 

I am not above… I am outside. 

To be so different is to look through a barrier. 

Them in there, and me… me out here. Alone. 

 

What I want doesn’t matter. 

What I strive to achieve is irrelevant. 

Life is long, and meaning absent. 

Mechanical. Automatic. Expected. 

 

I want to be happy for them. 

To have what I am denied. 

The adage to simply not want it doesn’t apply. 

The mind has little say on the workings of the heart. 

One can only cut it out. 

Store it under fabric and façades, to weep in private. 

 

What more is there to do, when one is ice in a desert? 


End file.
